I read an article this morning that brought me back to my college days and my time spent in and out of Philadelphia. You may have read about “HitchBOT” the friendly well meaning hitchhiking robot that made its way through Germany, the Netherlands and Canada relying on the goodness of people along the way? Here in the US he was hitchhiking from Massachusetts to California but couldn’t make it out of the streets of Philly. HitchBOT was built by Canadian researchers and was programmed to hold basic conversations and offer “charming jests” along his travels and was intended to be an experiment in how humans interact with technology. HitchBOT was intentionally made to be non-threatening with his pool noodle arms and legs and bright yellow rain boots with matching gloves.

A terrible tragedy befell HitchBOT, he was beheaded (the head is still missing) and maimed over the weekend in Philadelphia’s Old City neighborhood. I would say that in an ironic twist this was more about how technology survives human beings particularly in a tough town like Philadelphia. It’s important to note that I’m certainly not condoning the actions of the maniacal man stomping the guts out of HitchBOT while wearing his Randall Cunningham jersey (there’s some speculation on the video being a hoax). But I’d ask the creators of HitchBOT if you really thought that he was going to make it through a town that boos Santa Claus, throws ice balls during NFL games and has a holding cell in the basement of their football stadium for rowdy Eagles fans? And who knows what HitchBOT said to this man? What were his charming jests? What some people may view as charming others, particularly in Philly, see as fighting words. Did HitchBOT ask why the Eagles have no Super Bowls? Did he say something about the Phillies being in last place in their division? Did he ask why Chip Kelly got rid of many of his superstars and is seemingly starting over from scratch on a complete rebuild? Did he take a stand on his favorite being Geno’s or Pat’s? I guess we’ll never know and HitchBOT certainly isn’t talking.

In a humanitarian effort a local Philadelphia group of design tech engineers called the Hackfactory are offering to rebuild him but need the permission of the original designers and a list of missing parts. Good for you Hackfactory! I would like to offer you some Coaching services based upon my countless SEPTA rides in and out of Philly’s 30^th Street Station and time spent all over your great city. Considering the surroundings have you thought of ways to recreate HitchBOT other then in his original form?   Is it possible that he needs an attitude and a little swagger? I’m thinking along the lines of the old TV show “Robot Wars”. Perhaps he should be propelled by tank treads and be made of reinforced armor plated steel? Maybe you should consider having him dispense cheese steaks while simultaneously reciting Philadelphia sporting news famous dates and events? Maybe he should have some feathers like an Eagle or a Mummer? Have you considered having him escorted out of town by the Philly Fanatic? I believe any of these “improvements” will raise the likelihood of HitchBOT making it out of the “City of Brotherly Love” in one piece.